It's in the Detail

You will work proactively to manage workloads and provide updates and information as requested.A successful performer in this role is approachable, adaptable and willing to go the extra mile. A good eye for detail, particularly when working under pressure, coupled with a responsive and positive attitude is essential. An ability to work within a team is also critical to effective performance. Monitor stationary supplies and order new or replacement stock ...

I came across this job advert on a website and couldn't help but smile. As well as the usual cliches - willing to go the extra mile, indeed - a good eye for detail clearly wasn't in the remit of the person who posted the advert.

It reminded me of when my daughters went to St. David's High School in Dalkeith a few years ago. Report cards could, on occasion, be comedy gold. My youngest daughter's report had a summary from her English teacher.

Michelle is hard working but tends to chat a lot in class and lacks attention to detail.

I suspected Michaela wasn't making as much an impression on her teacher as she thought...

East Stirlingshire's Magnificent Gesture

I try to keep my football thoughts on my other blog at http://www.ontheterracing.blogspot.com/

But not only are East Stirlingshire FC going great guns in the Scottish Third Division - if they beat Elgin on Wednesday they'll go top of the league - but they're doing their bit for the community.

The Elgin game at Ochilview will be free admission for all. Yes, free. There will be a collection to raise funds for the Yorkhill Children's Foundation and Shire are asking fans to donate in return for not paying an entrance fee to the game.

Football is presently having some bad press in the wake of the John Terry saga. It's time to highlight a magnificent gesture by East Stirlingshire - and one that deserves recognition.

Fraudulent Behaviour?

Father, Dear Father

I have a suspicion a few parents will relate to this. Particularly fathers. Particularly those fathers who have daughters.

Being a creature of habit, I paid a visit to my mother in her sheltered housing complex in Edinburgh's south side on Tuesday evening. Before I left the office to head there, I received a text message from my younger daughter Michaela.

Hiya Dad

Now this immediately raised my suspicions. Said daughter lives with one of her pals whose husband is fighting in Afghanistan. Michaela is there to give her some moral support (as if things weren't bad enough for the poor girl...) To cut a long story shorter, Michaela usually sends me a text message if she wants something. Usually money.

Are you going to Granny's tonight? I can pick you up after work.

My discomfort increased. She is going to see her Granny? And offering to pick me up? I was tempted to text back 'How much money do you want?' but I thought better of it and replied I would just see her round there. Which I did. And she gave me a lift home afterwards.

On the way back I sat in the passenger seat of her rather flash gold coloured MG sports car and waited for the bad news. There had to be bad news. There's no such thing as a free lunch with Michaela and I waited for the pitiful Daaad, can I borrow some money? request. But, to my surprise it didn't happen. She dropped me off, waved cheerio and was on her way. The last time she sent me a text message was a few weeks ago when she asked me to be the guarantor for said MG sports car. Naturally, being too soft for my own good, I agreed. I waited for her to tell me she wasn't going to be able to keep up the payments. But the words didn't come.

Today, I received another text message from Michaela.

Hiya Dad. What's that gig you want to go to next month?

I had mentioned my desire to see the fabulous ska band The Beat in Edinburgh next month. Darling daughter has now confirmed - with her third text message to me in two days - she has bought tickets for me for my birthday at the end of this month.

Touched as I am by my daughter's apparent concern for me and by her wish to get me something I actually want for a birthday present, my over-riding concern is one of anxiety. When your children reach adulthood you let them go and fend for themselves. The other side of that particular coin is they are determined to demonstrate they don't need you and, as is the case with Michaela and her older sister Laura, you can hear nothing from them for days. My running gag is that I only hear from my girls when they want something. Michaela is being nice to her poor, harassed, financially strained father and apparently looking for nothing in return.

Or will the phone ring tomorrow and I'll be greeted with the words 'Hello Mr Smith. I understand you agreed to be the guarantor for Michaela Smith...'

September 1962

An oft-used phrase heard these days is 'the nanny state'. This is a photograph of me inviting someone to a 'square-go' when I was a little over six months old. Yes, it was so long ago the photo is in black and white.

No nanny state back in 1962. In fact, as this photo illustrates, no nanny at all - hence the threatening of an outbreak of hostilities. What I find intriguing is not my stunning good looks, even at the baby stage....it's the fact one of the laddies standing at the pram has what appears to be two empty beer cans tied to his back.

Nanny state? We were a hard bunch back in the early 1960s...

That's What Friends Are For

Friday night, last orders at the pub, get in the car and head for the club....Jeez, I'm delving into another Lilly Allen track...

I was out sampling the delights of Friday night in the centre of Scotland's magnificent capital city. Good company, good food and several shots of Jack Daniels made for a hugely enjoyable evening.

I saw someone who I hadn't seen for about a year. She has had a difficult year, having to deal with a close family bereavement, work issues and other problems. The last time I saw her she seemed to be struggling with the burden of it all and, I have to say, few could blame her. Last night she looked so much better; we're old work colleagues although we went our separate ways about four years ago. Rather shamefully, I haven't been in contact with her for nearly a year and I apologised profusely for my lack of sensitivity. But within minutes we had resumed normal service; the banter, the mickey-taking, trading mock insults - more importantly, the laughter had returned.

It was good to see her looking so well. I know it's a difficult journey for her and there remain significant obstacles ahead for her to overcome. But with the help of her friends and the people who care about her, I have no doubts she will get there. After all, that's what real friends are for.

Moreover, in what has been a somewhat perplexing week for me, she reminded me what true friendship is all about. For that, I'm truly grateful.

Friend of Mine

I don't want us to have a fight,

But in the background I can hear you chatting sh!te,

I hear it every night.

And you think you're being really cool,

You've been doing it since we were both at school,

Now who looks like a fool.

You're no friend of mine girl

And I've known it for a while girl,

You're just a waste of time girl

Why don't you have another line girl.

Tell me what did you expect?

Have you got no self respect?

Reputation to protect?

Soon you'll be a nervous wreck.

What happened to the good old days?

I was kinda hoping this was all a stupid phase

Who are you anyway?

I know you've heard this all before

I know some people who are calling you a whore

Don't know you anymore

You're no friend of mine girl

And I've known it for a while girl,

You're just a waste of time girl

Why don't you have another line girl.

Tell me what did you expect?

Have you got no self respect?

Reputation to protect?

Soon you'll be a nervous wreck.

One of my favourite Lily Allen tracks.