Wednesday, 13 April 2011

Dear Mr. Cameron

Please find below a suggestion for fixing the U.K's economy.

Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan. You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:

There are about 10 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1 million each severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Ten million job openings - unemployment fixed

2) They MUST buy a new British car. Ten million cars ordered - car industry fixed

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - housing crisis fixed

4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university - crime rate fixed

5) They MUST buy £100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week .....there's your money back in duty/tax etc

6) Instead of stuffing around with the carbon emissions trading scheme that makes us pay for the major polluters, tell the greedy buggers to reduce their pollution emissions by 75% within 5 years or we shut them down.

It can't get any easier than that!

P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances...


miruspeg said...

Mike when I read these excellent suggestions I thought PRP could also stand for Personal Recovery Play or Poverty Reduction Program or even Psychiatric Rehabilitation Program!

I wonder why governments all over the Western world think bailing out the banks without any conditions attached is the road to take to fix economies.

Excellent post my friend.
Peggy xxxx

Adullamite said...

I'm with you there!

A Daft Scots Lass said...

Can I make you a custom-designed shiney soapbox?

Sausage Fingers said...

Simplicity at its finest - too bad they never listen to reason.
No matter the location on the globe they all seem to all serve themselves...politicians that is.
good luck.

Mike Smith said...

Thank you, you kind people!