Being There

Times are tough for a lot of people these days. The economic downturn - this appears to be the new phrase for recession - is having an impact in many ways and, working as I do in the field of Human Resources, never a day passes without at least one person on the phone pleading for work, desperate to earn some money. Of course, there are people who were struggling with life before the bottom fell out of the financial world and this merely adds to their woes. But there is something to cling on to when you think you have been cast afloat from life and are drowning in the sea of despair. And it costs nothing. I'm talking about friendship.

I was out on Friday evening for a few drinks and something to eat - and another few drinks - and spent the evening in the company of someone who has gone through a particularly difficult time recently, both professionally and personally. Her mother passed away quite suddenly and unexpectedly last October and, naturally, this left her devastated. I know from personal experience the effect the sudden death of someone you love can have and the aftermath of trying to cope. My friend appears to have received little support from her place of work and at one time I know she was seriously considering the ultimate means of ending her misery. Thankfully, she decided against this option. We met a few weeks ago and simply by being with her I hoped she would realise there are people who really care about her. She cut a forlorn figure back then and I tried to give her as much support as I could although it was difficult to know what to do or say to help. But just being there is often enough.

On Friday we met again. Now the Scots psyche can be a curious one. The phrase 'Taking the Michael' could well have originated in Scotland given our penchant for sarcasm, putting people down and what we term 'friendly banter'. It helps if you don't have a thick skin and aren't offended easily. Thus, on Friday, it was very near normal service resumed as my friend and I traded mock insults and put each other down at nearly every opportunity. But we loved it. It has been a long time since I have seen her laugh as much. Indeed, it has been a long time since I laughed as much myself, what with dark clouds seeming to hover over me of late. In reality my problems pale into insignificance compare to those of some other people I know. For a few hours we almost forgot about our worries. Admittedly one or two 'nippy sweeties' helped in this respect but we both thoroughly enjoyed ourselves - Friday night simply flew by.

It was great to see her getting back to her old self. Of course she still hurts like hell and she will never fully get over such devastation. But, in time, she will learn to cope. With the help of her friends I'm hopeful she will. If Friday night is anything to go by she's already on the path to realising life is precious and she is loved very much.

Sometimes you just need someone to tell you that.