The NHS has some new advice for people struggling to schedule a fitness routine into their daily lives - a workout between the sheets. According to the NHS Direct website, "sexercise" can lower the risk of heart attacks and helps people live longer. Endorphins released during orgasm stimulate immune system cells, which also helps target illnesses like cancer, as well as wrinkles, it states.
From the BBC News Website
It's unusual for me to start the New Year on a positive note (rest assured, it won't last) Not only is Christmas over for another year but the above report on the BBC News website quotes the good old National Health Service advising that sex is good for you. However, without wishing to rain on any parade, I feel I must take issue with some of its findings.
'Sexercise' can lower the risk of heart attacks and help people live longer. My father, God rest his soul, was married three times and had countless affairs. He died of a heart attack at just 58 years - it may well have been that his extra-marital activities helped contribute to his early demise. I don't know if he died with a smile on his face but he was on his own at the time...
What also intrigues me is how the NHS discover these nuggets of information. Presumably by conducting surveys or getting organisations to do this on their behalf. But how accurate are the findings? I have to say I've never been asked to help with a survey about my sex life. If I were I would almost certainly give misleading answers.
How old are you, Mr Smith?
47 (that bit's true)
And how many times a week do you have sex?
Oh, twice, sometimes three times a night...
I see.
Occasionally there's someone with me....
Quite. Do you talk to your wife when you make love?
Only if she's on the phone...
You're not taking this seriously, are you Mr Smith?
Well, you started it...
I do occasionally receive 'spam' emails from less than reputable online pharmaceutical companies offering me 'Viagra' at a reduced rate. I once asked my local chemist - on behalf of a friend, you understand - about Viagra and if I could get it over the counter. 'Only if you take the whole packet at once' replied the chemist.
The Christmas period saw a plethora of Carry On films on television. Actor Sid James was not averse to the odd affair or five - yet this didn't seem to improve his rugged features. As his one time lover Barbara Windsor would ask as she went into his pub 'Have you got a large one?' Sid's reply of 'I've had no complaints so far. Har, har,har!' is one of the classic lines of British cinema...
However, perhaps I'm doing the NHS boffins a disservice. Above is a photo of me early on New Years Day. Draw your own conclusions, dear reader...
4 comments:
Your sense of humour is still intact Mr Smith in 2010. :)
Its a pity no-one has asked you to par take in a survey of this nature.
Also I think you met your match with that Chemist!!
I once asked a butcher if he had lovely legs (small chicken drum sticks) he just roared with laughter and said definitely would I like to see them.
How funny are you? What a delightful post. I am visiting this morning from Joanne's Fifty Factor. Glad to have popped over just so I could laugh today! PS I am a girl and I get TONS of emails about Viagra! Who sends them? : )
I see where you're coming from Peggy! There's a joke about a butcher and Ayrshire bacon but you really need to hear it rather than read it...
Thanks for visiting LwK - you're very welcome and I hope you will become a frequent visitor.
that photo at the top. is that not Vladimir Romanov at the moment he realises he can't shuffle the money round in circles any more?
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