A Seasonal Greet Continued...

It is, perhaps, another sign of being a forty something that one of the many gripes I have about life is the lack of entertainment one can glean from television programmes these days. And, as I hinted in my last rant, Christmas Day merely underlined just how much tosh is produced for the small screen in an age when celebrities rule (for celebrity this can also mean non-entity) and people with next to no talent can achieve ‘fame’

On Christmas Day the terrestrial channels in the UK - BBC, ITV and Channels Four and Five - had schedules so bland it made my daughter Laura’s attempt at prawn cocktail look positively drooling…

In years gone by the BBC and ITV would put their Christmas Day faith in a big family entertainment show such as Morecambe and Wise or The Two Ronnies or a big film such as the latest James Bond release. ITV’s film offering this year was a four year old Harry Potter flick while the BBC went with the tried - or should that be tired? - and trusted Wallace and Gromit. Predictably, both BBC and ITV stuck with a format that had brought average ratings of three viewers and a dog earlier in the year with special Christmas Day showings of Strictly Come Dancing and Dancing on Ice. In case any of their viewers didn’t realise it, ITV helpfully added ‘At Christmas’ to their programme title…

Add the usual special hour long editions of EastEnders and Coronation Street along with the utterly predictable Doctor Who and Mr Bean and the Christmas Day television fare was as banal as turkey and brussel sprouts. The BBC did bring back the Royle Family but even the antics of Ricky Tomlinson and co. seemed tired. Admittedly it was great seeing Stanley Baxter back on television again but the Scots entertainer is now 82 and his ‘new’ material amounted to a couple of impressions of the Queen and ITV used this as an excuse to repeat clips of Baxter in his heyday, an era when entertainment meant just that.

As if to prove the point, on Boxing Day the BBC went back to the 1970s. The sad death of the corporation's former Head of Light Entertainment, Bill Cotton, earlier this year had a silver lining for those anonymous BBC focus groups charged with keeping the licence fee payers entertained today. It gave the Beeb the flimsiest of excuses to show on Boxing Day yet another Christmas episode of Morecambe and Wise as well as The Two Ronnies and The Generation Game. We may have seen them countless times before but these shows from three decades ago are still funnier than watching today’s penchant for The Fifty Greatest Comedy Moments/Movie Endings/Showbiz Comebacks/Christmas Songs etc. etc. which are accompanied by those irritating talking heads of nonentities (see above) who feel the need to explain why Del Boy falling over the bar counter in Only Fools and Horses was just so funny…

In today’s age of multi-channel television with satelite and Freeview channels aplenty there is certainly more choice of viewing than when I was but a lad. But, sadly, it means there is more rubbish on than ever before. As Christmas has proved for the umpteenth year in a row.

On Wednesday it’s Hogmanay. No wonder we turn to alcohol at this time of the year…